Today: the day to live

This is part 26 of my 'Led By Heart' series for the 31-day writing challenge. You can find the list of all my 31 posts here. Click here to check out the other participating blogs!

You know what they say... people wait all week for Friday, all year for summer and all life for happiness...

Let's make a conscious choice now that we're going to stop waiting.

Today's quote is a little reminder for you for the forthcoming week.

You can make the most of your time.

One day at a time, one minute at a time.

What do you put first?

This is part 24 of my 'Led By Heart' series for the 31-day writing challenge. You can find the list of all my 31 posts here. Click here to check out the other participating blogs!

I really like the idea of saying "It's not a priority for me", instead of "I'm just so busy, I don't have time for that." Why going to the trouble of coming up with all the excuses when most of the time the truth is plain and simple. We make time for who and what we want. 

What are you putting first in your life? And is it really what matters most?

It seems to me that the biggest lesson yet to be learnt for me is how to balance it all. All the parts and aspects of my life... I think it's time to set my priorities straight, so that it would no longer be about what I want right now, but what matters most to me. Let's make it priorities over conveniences.

I believe that that's how we change our lives - it is only when what we truly want most is firmly placed in our hearts, that we'll be able to make better moment-to-moment decisions, plan our day in a more meaningful day, and very plainly: be happier.

Our priorities are not what we say they are, they're reflected in how we live.

We always have time for the things we put first. Let's begin finding ways and stop making excuses.

And this is my (renewed) list:

My spiritual life.
My relationship with God, with myself and the world. Seeing Him in everyone. Creating a life filled with peace, trust, love and forgiveness. Helping people. Sharing what I've learnt along my journey.
Creating memories and having experiences, not more things.

My relationship with my man, my family and friends.
Always making time for them. Supporting and encouraging. Caring.

My job.
Finding one. Becoming financially independent. Making a difference. Doing something meaningful, useful, helpful. Doing what I love. Being proud of my work. Staying curious, humble and keeping a beginner-mentality.

My hobbies. 
Writing, drawing, exercising, cooking, reading, traveling, dancing, arts, films, languages...
Caring for the environment. Having an 'green' lifestyle.

(to be modified... & continued...)


What's on your list? :)

Led By Heart: use your time wisely

This is part 14 of my 'Led By Heart' series for the 31-day writing challenge. You can find the list of all my 31 posts here. Click here to check out the other participating blogs!

I don't remember when exactly I first noticed that I wasn't able to make good use of my time, that it was slipping through my fingers way too fast, that I was going to bed with regrets and lots of promises for tomorrow, which I then didn't manage to keep; it must have been some time in my late teens. And ever since I've envied all those purposeful, productive, fruitful people, who all have the same 24 hours in their day like me, yet they use them to get sooo much done! How do they do it?

I know that a lot of people who have difficulties with managing their time start beating themselves up and branding themselves as lazy. But I believe that being lazy is something a lot different; when you're lazy, you don't really care that you're not productive, or that you're wasting your time. You're just awfully comfortable and want to stay that way for as long as you can. But if you're like me, you don't want to be lazy, you want to get stuff done, work on your goals and dreams, and when you don't, you feel defeated and there's this sense of emptiness, even hopelessness sometimes. You feel that time has got the better of you once again, that you can't stay on top of things. You view time as something untamable, uncontrollable, ephemeral, and yourself as weak, distracted, purposeless. But with an attitude like that, how can you ever change it?

In order to finally crack this, I decided to first start observing my "time habits". I wanted to find out where I get derailed and distracted. I realized that I haven't learnt how to become focused; I possess an extremely flickering mind which tends to provide only a perfunctory perception. When there's a bit more demanding task in front of me, one that requires some active, productive thinking, immediately my mind gets busy to find something a little less difficult to do. And I don't even realize that I'm not doing what I'm supposed to till many minutes have already passed. In other words, I need to get serious about cultivating awareness, so that I can tell at all times if there's any difference between what I'm doing and what I should be doing.

The other problem is that I tend to just do whatever is currently "screaming" the most, instead of what is most important. And lastly, I tend to do whatever at the given moment feels the best and most enjoyable, instead of planning out my tasks (with their importance in mind) and purposefully completing them one by one; it's okay to take my time and do things slowly as long as I get them done eventually.

I once came across one of those motivational posters showing a young smiling woman resting her head comfortably on a pillow, and next to her it said Satisfied with today, eager for tomorrow. And it may sound a bit cheesy, but I became totally fascinated with this promise. How wonderful would it be to have this peace of mind, this satisfaction, at the end of each day?

Now that is a goal worth reaching, I thought. And so...

Here's my 10 steps to get in control of my (and your!) time:

#1 go to bed early and get up early
This one is sooo important. I know that when I don't have a good, early start in the morning and I don't get into the flow of work right there, my plans for the day tend to go awry. I'm going to start working on changing my routine and slowly begin getting up earlier - and then getting to work asap.

#2 cultivate awareness
I cannot stress enough how important it is to be conscious of what we're really doing, to be present at all times! We can learn it like anything else, it just takes patience and, well, practise. At first, we might manage to be truly aware only for a couple of minutes, but I believe it is possible to achieve complete, "full-time" awareness. That way we can be truly present at every decision we make, and when we become distracted and stuck on Facebook or youtube, we’ll be able to get back on track much sooner and more easily.

#3 limit significantly time spent on social websites, emails etc.
It should be something of a I-need-a-quick-break-to-clear-my-head, not our first thing in the morning go-to! It could be a good idea to ban yourself from checking those sites altogether for, say, a few days or even a week. And perhaps you'll see a) how much of your time it's been consuming, and b) that you can actually do well without it. If you don't want or can't avoid it completely, set a limit (30 minutes a day?) for the time you spend there. Block your browser from loading those pages if you must. I've decided to be strict with myself on this one.

Also, try not work on the computer when you don't need to! If you want to write something, and you know you'll spend half the time on Pinterest instead, take a notebook and a pen and write at least the draft in hand - sitting at a good distance from your laptop (maybe in the garden or a coffee shop?). For writing you can also use programs like OMM writer which take up you entire screen, not allowing you to see anything else (and it even provides some soothing music for you to listen to as you write). 

#4 set a timer, divide your work in small portions
This is a really efficient way of getting focused - split your task into 20 or 30 minute increments and after each bit take a few minutes to do something just for fun, reward yourself (make yourself a cup of coffee, check your email...). But don't get stuck there! That's why it's good to set a limit to your breaks as well. Don't forget to get quickly back to work.

#5 make your to-do list the evening before
So that in the morning you know right away what you need to get done.
And make a weekly (or even monthly) to-do list as well. It's important to have the bigger picture in mind and know what you're working towards long-term. That way you don't get derailed by all the new things that are coming up. Set a bigger goal - should be just one or two - for the week/month, split it into smaller, manageable bits and tackle one every day.

#6 set reasonable goals
I know I can have totally unreasonable expectations for myself and I'm not the most patient person. Maybe that's the reason why I fail to accomplish what I want. Know your limits! If you can, always double the amount of time you think it will take to complete a task.
Divide your task into smaller chunks - don’t just put "learn French" to your to-do list, write "learn 5 new irregular verbs, or do 3 grammar exercises, or listen to 1 podcast", instead! This is also so much more encouraging, as you will actually be able to tick it off your list at the end of the day!

#7 prioritize!! 
Are you sure that what’s on your list is really so important? All of it? I want you to take the time to reconsider every point one more time. Do you really want to do all that, or do just think you should? Is it necessary? Will it contribute to your (or someone else's) happiness?

DO THE MOST IMPORTANT STUFF FIRST!

#8 delegate
Do you really have to do it all yourself? Why? Make sure it’s not your ego telling you that only you can do it the best way, or that others just can't do it without you. Don’t take responsibility for anyone else’s tasks unless you have a very good reason for it, TRUST them they can do it!

#9 be accountable
Get it out there! Tell others about your goals, your struggles, your decision to get better at time management (or anything else) - write it on your blog or Facebook, tell a friend or a partner to keep asking you about your progress and checking up on you.
If you are a believer, don't forget you're accountable to the Spirit that you are and its purpose. Do you know that you have a destiny to fulfill?

#10 take it easy
You are not defined by check marks, and you are not defined by someone else's idea of accomplishment. Create your own perfect! 


I believe we are supposed to thoroughly enjoy our lives and be proud of what we're doing. We should bear good fruit. What's the fruit of your life?


Here's my other post on making good use of time 'On waiting till Monday' ;)

Led By Heart: there's time for everything

This is part 8 of my 'Led By Heart' series for the 31-day writing challenge. You can find the list of all my 31 posts here. Click here to check out the other participating blogs!

Today was hard for me. I kept struggling with time, always falling behind what I thought was my schedule. I tried to persuade it to slow down and give me a few more minutes. I wished I would make more of my day.

Days like this... I know them too well.

And then I finally dropped everything to sit in silence with Him for a while and ask for guidance. I felt nervous and heartsick and there was that flood of harshness in my head getting ready to deluge me. But then I saw an image in my heart, of a woman strolling quietly and slowly in a blossoming orchard. No haste, no worries, no agitation. There was a sense of deep peace, a peace of knowing that there's a perfect time for everything. And every minute is precious and has its own beauty.

I once read a beautiful piece of wisdom saying that when you put the most important things first, there's time for everything.

I often forget that. I do everything else and everything else and everything else but that thing my heart keeps whispering to me about. Priorities... how often they elude us as we become trapped between what we think we should be doing and what we really want to do. So many distractions in today's world. But the heart won't be silenced, it'll always be waiting on us.

So, let's look at that schedule one more time. This is my precious day, my hours and my minutes. My life.

Dear heart, what do you want me to do next?


Time... our perpetual teacher. Here you'll find my tips on how to start using time wisely, and here's my reflection on the struggle of making the most of it.

31 Days of Being Led By Heart - Day 1

Today could have been just one those pathless days. Perhaps you know them, too. A day that seems to go by in a blink of an eye, a day spent doing various chores and task, yet none of them really important or satisfying, all of them feeling like they are merely keeping me from doing what my heart craves. Whatever that is. A day which, when I'll reach its end, will appear unfulfilled, a tiny bit hollow, fruitless. And then, in my bed, staring at the thickening darkness behind the window, thinking and promising to myself that tomorrow I will do more, I will find it and get back to it - my path, I will try to tune in to my heart and listen...

Because that's what happens so often, all those obligations, those to-do lists, the possibilities and other peoples' paths become louder than everything else. I've been told more than once in my life that the world is my oyster; I can amount to anything, I'm young, clever... But it seems that I still haven't been able to find out what that special thing I should amount to is. All I know is that it's there. Sometimes I can sense it, its presence, with acute inevitability, other times I feel completely and utterly lost. Isn't it the most terrifying thing sometimes, those endless possibilities? Or at least the idea of them... Could it be, that this idea alone is just a distraction? A means of deafening me, blinding me, making my head spin? I know it's there, my path, and I also know that it's not what I've ever imagined it to be, it winds and turns and goes up and descends again, always waiting for me to take the next step, always ready, hopeful, open to anything.

Just another pathless day. This one is not. I am accepting a challenge - to write and create every single day of October. Part of me is now giving me all kinds of reasons why there's no way I will complete it. Part of me is saying This is your chance! And it is also my choice, a one I'll have to make every day again and again. 

I would like this to be an account of a journey with the wisest of guides, my heart, a journey of finding my Self, of simple happiness and the joy of taking small steps. 

It's not supposed to be all gloomy and heavy, but it might be at times. It's not supposed to be all cheerful and gritted-teeth-positive, but it could be, too. Most of all, I want it to be authentic and written as message of a heart to other seeking and learning hearts out there. I hope we could connect, at least in spirit, along the way.

Day 2 - Know Your 'Why'

Day 3 - Perception Is Everything

Day 4 - Own Up to What You Believe In

Day 5 - Home Is Where The Heart Is I.

Day 6 - Home Is Where The Heart Is II.

Day 7 - Forming Genuine Friendships I.

Day 8 - There's Time For Everything

Day 9 - 10 Steps to Forming New Friendships

Day 10 - About Osho Zen Tarot

Day 11 - Home Is Where the Heart Is III.

Day 12 - When You Heart Has Been Broken

Day 13 - When You Feel Disheartened

Day 14 - Using Your Time Wisely

Day 15 - You'll Find What You're Looking For

Day 16 - How to Reconnect With Your Heart

Day 17 - How to forgive

Day 18 - The art of allowing

Day 19 - You are the ocean

Day 20 - What to do when every day feels the same

Day 21 - The frightening message: You can do it!

Day 22 - Choose by your heart

Day 23 - 5 questions to ask yourself every day

Day 24 - What do you put first?

Day 25 - Home is where the heart is - Surrey Hills

Day 26 - Today is the day to live

Day 27 - Where are you going?

Day 28 - Your life is important

Day 29 - Catching my breath

Day 30 - So you'd like to try a blogging challenge...

Day 31 - The Way to Heaven

On waiting till Monday...

...on waiting till I’m ready...

...till everything is just right.

We all know when that is most of the time.

Now.

Does it ever happen to you as well? That guilty I'll start tomorrow, on Monday, when I'm done cleaning, cooking, after just this one episode. I just need to read this book first, attend that seminar or retreat, talk to this guru, and then I'll start. Can we ever have enough information, enough preparation? Enough readiness? Those forgotten new year's resolutions... they have a land of their own, behind the mountains of remorse and the lake of excuses. For some people this land is even further away; one gets there through plains of self-pity and valleys of anger. But the truth is that one never really goes there.

The trouble is not that we are postponing that task, we are really putting off our life. When does that start? When will I stop doing everything else, and everything else, and everything else?

Time... always always always trying to manage to do it all and every time failing to accomplish it... I’ve been trying for so long, always with the same hope at first and then beating myself up for having wasted so much of my time.

How about introducing some change. How about trying it differently this time. Just this time.

What if I paused and remained lovingly and patiently for a little while in my undecidedness, in my unwillingness to do what I think I should be doing, in my unwillingness to start? And then perhaps accepted it. What if I paused in that stream of judgement, stress and distractedness, and just accepted this situation of mine, this moment, myself.

The thing is, I am deeply flawed. That’s the way I am. And guess what, it’s alright. The One up there and everywhere loves me just as I am. I don’t need to perfect myself, to improve myself - I need to accept all of me, with everything; with the black, with the white, and with everything in between. Nothing in me is good or bad, it’s all part of the whole which is me, and a wholeness contains everything. It’s not for me to judge it, just to accept it.

What if I accepted time as something that is a part of my experience here, as a friend, a teacher, and not something that’s blocking me, tormenting me and controlling me and I have to fight it. Time is like karma, impartial, unbiased and just. A teacher, a gift, a tool for our growth.

What if I accepted time, accepted everything about it, all of its qualities: the fact that it flows and passes ceaselessly for everyone on Earth, that we can’t get it back, rewind it nor skip some of it, that we can’t slow it down or speed it up. That we can only live it. Live in it. We can be conscious of it and walk through it with awareness, in the light of our consciousness, noticing it, savoring it. 

Time isn’t unlimited, we all have our portion. What if I perceived it as a beautiful, precious gift? Not I have time, or time has me. I am. And time is. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now.

Life is now. When else?

Time is not my enemy. What if I stopped complaining about it and appreciated it, thanked it?
Not to stop the time, but to stop myself. And accepted that I am learning and am still not very good at it, that I haven't used a lot of my time very well... Accepted that time is my task. How do I know this? Because I struggle with it. Time exists only so that we could learn how to make good use of it. Do you think there’s such thing as time up there and everywhere?

Acceptance. And then, listen to your heart, your soul... What do you desire? What would you really like to do now? What do you not have enough of? What do you feel most drawn to? What do you need? And after that, an impulse, a gentle push of a deep yearning, a flash of an idea, when your heart skips a beat or begins to beat even faster. And then... do it. Take action.
Often the most difficult thing is just to get up and start. What’s stopping you? What’s making you postpone it now?

It may be hard to do it. It may require diligence, patience, sacrifice of other things, and most of all awareness. What if I accepted that? Yes, it may involve all of these. That’s the way it may be. It may be hard. And it won’t be perfect. Accept this, this fear, this unwillingness, hesitation. It’s yours, because you’re experiencing it now. And then it can change. Maybe it won’t be that hard. Maybe all it takes it to begin and let your intuition guide you. Ask her to give you direction.

Life is now. What if you were conscious and aware of it? Don’t wait too long. Act as soon as you feel the impulse. Get up. Go. Don’t think it through, don’t rationalize. Don’t say But I don’t know how. Get to work and let it lead you. Your soul knows what to do. God knows what to do. Your mind doesn’t need to know it. Give up the need to control everything, to know and understand everything. You won’t. Give up the need to have a perfect plan of twelve logical, well thought of points. It’s more than enough that you know point 1. That’s more than enough. 

And maybe it won't be going smoothly at first. You will feel that it isn’t exactly that. Not that it’s not perfect (because it will never be), but that you’re not in the flow yet, that it’s not resonating with you fully. But that will come! If you desire to write, sit down to a notebook and put the tip of your pen to the first line, and write the first word. First thing that comes to your mind - anything. It doesn’t have to be (and it won’t be) the perfect first word. It won’t be like your overly strict mind wants it to be, you most likely won't perform like it requires you to perform. Alright? So just write. Do it!

And then, slowly, it will come to you. You will get into the flow, you’ll tune in, connect, break through. It will come. And over time it will be easier. You will get better.

What if we were willing to go through many many many many attempts and “failures” to get to the real and truthful?
What if we rejoiced at every mistake?
What’s a mistake anyway?

A lesson.

Learn it.

And move on.

Create some more.